As straw dogs [Meiling teacher]

standing 2012 annual year look back, starting from the 12-year-old, I never had a quiet year, every year there are always two or three bad a lot of influence things. 2011 years, still the case.

2011 years, my old father received a side, but not the physical strength to take care of him, He commissioned a caring hospital.A week to go see him once, and each took his hand and lie to him, over time your home.So again and again, the father will be angry, grabbed my hand and bite me, since then, I will not cheat, he said to take him home only two days to see you again.Father, a paraplegic, can not go, little able to sit, can open the pronunciation, but say the sound is mostly did not understand, only to go right strong, only pronounced my name clear.He has a ferocious temper and often angry, often caught the urine, often shouting.Father many times mom cried, did not know he was missing his mother, to express his helplessness; or miss a child his mother to give his love and take care of or desire in his helpless, like a mother take care of him.I always thought that was the last one, but, as a daughter, I do not do like a mother to take care of him.

think of the father, I always tears to flow.

care hospital, from time to time someone died.Is a 60-year-old man and his father a room, he and the parENT sample could not move, and father in a room a month, no.The father looked at his last breath, sudden high blood pressure since dying, I panic for a week, God take care of my father is once again safe.Thank God!

After two weeks, and his father an old man in a room, not any.The doctors found that some symptoms of the old man, father to change to another room, etc.all over, and only then his father moved back.The old man his father was gone, he will understand, I say go, stop go, just do not bite me.

I want the father received a house, two care workers to take care of, he can come out into looking at me.However, I do not have the economic strength.Comfort my brother, Zandie have been more blessed than those for the elderly at home, the number of elderly disease to such a degree a year and a half year he died.I know, no one to care, the elderly, mostly froze to starve to death.But our father, so the state has been seven years, is still alive, and manned.

No! My father, he should enjoy the more thoughtful care.Are my efforts were not enough! Sense of security, we do the most basic filial sons and daughters of parENTs, but also the socio-economic well-developed civilization bottom line mark.

2011 years, my eyes bleeding.This is the second retinal problems.For the first time 2004 .Last retinal problems, the doctor did not give any treatmENT program, I sat in the hospital and cried and cried over, wiped away tears, back to my counseling room, still seeking help to solve their psychological problems; still and son, laughing, smiling, his face no traces of any Qishang.This time, retinal hemorrhage, have on the experience, the more calm.Open the medicine to take for ourselves, to appease her husband a child, and to see a well-known doctor.Examination of the well-known doctor, or set of arguments, to die, vision is impossible to restore.Drugs are not to open, and took me to pass out.I went to see the small hospital in the ordinary doctor, doctor down open some medicine, give me some support and comfort.After a month in front of a black light, in front of a yellow light over a month.Vision is slowly recovering, but very weak, very weak.Little attention to see what text drawing, pain, and dizziness.Sometimes want to cry, and ultimately had an excuse, cry twice.

eyes can not see the day I am still smiling to help visitors.Only, the card look at the amount of consultation.

had wanted to give her husband one child, 2011 years, Pregnancy, pregnant with more than two is an empty gestational sac, the result is a painless.When people do, indeed no pain, the flow of people, but the pain for three days.The fourth day I began to answer the phone.Fifth day, consulting another row up, beaming, sitting around the callers, listening to their confusion and pain.

writing this text, I feel the eyes tiring.

Thank God, I can write.This year, I write two books.A parENTing book, a book of psychological adjustment.This year, I will be a substantial limit my case amount of counseling, my many years of experience counseling concepts and technologies spread, so that more consultation under the tutelage I grow up, help psychological callers.Just as I have done more consultation.

Tao Te Ching said a word: the heartless world, of all things as straw dogs.Saints heartless people as straw dogs.I am an unworthy sequel, plus one, my heart heartless, autologous as straw dogs.I have become accustomed to bad things, it happens to occur, as happened to someone else, what I can do, but also what to do.